TABOO TRUTHS

When I relocated to Virginia I left something very precious to me behind…my house!  Now it’s nothing special, in writing and it’s for sale!!!!!  I’ve lived there for almost 17 years and it most certainly is something special to me! 

About a week ago my wonderful real estate agent Kathy Byerly told me that there was a family that wanted to rent my house for a few months!  Great news….money I can most certainly use!  A family with two girls and two dogs, they will use the walls for a few months.  So why do I get a golf size lump in my throat when I think of someone else living in my house? 

This house as become very much a part of me.  2776 Zion Rd was the first and only house Courtney has known.  I can still see her taking her first steps in the doorway of my bedroom.  She spent hours swinging on the swing set from 3 years old to 15!  She used the kitchen to practice her tap, ballet and jazz until annoyance set in with me. (truly, I LOVED IT!)

Lindsay dance existed in the kitchen as well.  I still have a picture of her arms around a tree in the backyard when she was 3 1/2.  The tree now is full grown, as is she!  We made Christmas cookies in the kitchen, colored Easter eggs at the dining room table and she hung posters of 98% in her bedroom! Of course having her high school graduation party in the backyard was a memory not soon forgotten!

Last summer I had a new beautiful sliding glass door installed leading to our deck!  A few summers ago I created a “beach” area off the deck complete with a lazy swing and fire pit.  (got the idea from my cousin Lisa in Atlanta as did the margarita recipe!!)  The girls and I spent lots of time there!  I’ve resided the house and installed central air.

This house atop a hill is just wood, glass, brick and vinyl…so how did it become human?  Surely Lindsay, Courtney and I will take a part of this house with us!  We’ve had the talks that I treasure which shaped our relationships within these walls, the 3 of us religiously would pile on my bed to watch Saturday Night Live until our eyes grew heavy, I’ve shoveled snow from this driveway more times than I can count, I’ve spent countless hours tending to my perennial and herb garden, I planted the rosebush my Mom gave me in the corner of the fence, I listened to song after song of Jimmy Buffet on my iPod atop my John Deer riding lawn mower, Mac, Wendall, KayKay, Gidget and Zoe found resting place there and I’ve warmed myself by the real wood burning fireplace night after night during the cool Michigan winters.

I hope the family who will rent this place feels the warm and specialness it has lived.  Just a house right?  Lindsay and Courtney and me…..HOME!  Take a look around! 

Every evening as I approach my front step there is a sense of pure happiness and love the comes over me.  Not because I’m “home”, not because the days stress is melting into evening relaxation…but because of Tucker.  Tucker was a find through my Humane Society in Jackson Michigan.  He has certainly made my journey more interesting, frustrating and enjoyable!  He cannot wait for the door to open so he can receive caresses, scratches and kisses that I give him when I walk in.  His whole body wiggles and waves like a fish swimming upstream.  His soft ears fold back against his head and his eyes soften as small whimpers clear his throat.  It is truly a moment filled with just….being happy for both of us. 

In the morning while trying to make myself presentable and motivate myself for the day another pure moment of happiness occurs.  Jasper awaits at his post on our bed.  From the first sight of me emerging from the bathroom he immediately makes his move into what the girls and I now affectionately call “the fabio”!  He flips on his back with his puffy paws in the air, looking at you and releases a loud meow.  That would be the signal to begin the petting and playing.  Together we tease and play just enjoying the attention we both give one another.  It makes me smile just thinking about it. 

These two precious beings in my life are a few of many.  Mac, Wendal, KayKay, Gidget, Maddie, Dorie, Sasha, Cookie, Muffin, Tigger, Nicky 1 and Nicky 2….  I have been an animal lover since my memory can recall.  They have all brought such unconditional joy and love to my life as well as my girls lives.

The benefit of having these creatures as part of our family has been great for my girls.  They have learned patience, kindness, empathy, selflessness, responsibility and what it truly means to put something besides yourself first at times.  I can’t imagine my house without animals nor could my daughters.

Though it is a fact that unfortunately their lives don’t follow the same pathway and timeline that ours do, the impact they have on us can be profound.  I’m proud to say that all of the animals I have had the pleasure to care for have been “muts”.  Pure breeds almost without question are welcomed into good homes.  But the ones that weren’t planned for, the ones that find themselves without care or worse abused are the ones I gravitate to.  We all deserve kindness and someone to notice you exist.  My family has all lived and loved animals…as much as they sometimes try to hide it, Dad!

I believe my girls lives are richer for our animals.  If you have the heart, the commitment and the time to welcome an animal into your home I can recommend it highly!

How do you talk to me Mister/Miss business owner?   Being in the marketing industry for over a decade it still amazes me that most businesses don’t have the first clue on how to talk to woman or to moms.  How are you solving my problem or my need?  Do you know what they are?  Where do you go to learn about me?

With the explosion of technology and social aspects available on line, moms have been given more empowerment.  We now learn from each other and the intimidation we once felt facing the challenges of right or wrong decisions is fading.  We (Moms) are more confident and self assured!  We are out in the work force finding our way.  We are the most powerful financial force today.  When a decision to buy is  made in the average household today, women have the largest influence.  Yet, you still don’t know how to talk to me!?

This article from Media Post by Stacy Morrison addresses one key to understanding our voices.  She is the editor of Redbook and the article is “How to talk to Moms?  Listen.” 

Yes, we moms want to be witnessed, to spend some time on our “to-be” list, instead of merely living our “to-do” list, to get to be women first sometimes, just for ourselves. We get to be a “mom and” these days, not “just a stay-at-home mom” or a “working mom,” but a mom and a yoga teacher, a mom and an entrepreneur, a mom and a community organizer, a mom and a beauty addict, a mom and a church leader, a mom and so much more. And the only way for a marketer to learn the “so much more” is to open your ears (and your email in-box, and your Facebook page, and your whatever else you can imagine) and ask the question: “Hello, who are you?” And then listen.

She makes note that the social medium has allowed not only given herself, but other business as well, the advantage to actually learn about their potential readers and customers.  With Facebook, Twitter and others it gives them the opportunity to really listen to their concerns, problems and needs. 

So, all you out there who want me as a woman and mother to come through your door, buy your product, or refer you to my friends…are you listening?

Photo by Thibodeau